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Meg took particular joy in the unfurling of fern fronds, and often pointed them out to me. I have spread some of her ashes under each of the ferns that she planted in our backyard. |
I've been quashing the desire to share with you every little bump along my road to emotional recovery and every little misadventure in my attempts to take over the great variety of tasks around the house that I (blush!) took for granted, did not fully appreciate, and never thanked Meg adequately for. On the latter point I'll merely note that the taxes are done (Turbotax rather than Meg's #2 pencil), the grass is mown, the house is cleanish (Roomba!), I'm neither gaining nor losing weight, and I am eating my vegetables and fruit.
My emotional recovery is due in main part to the tremendous support and care I continue to get from all of you, and for which I can never thank you enough (without risking a run-on sentence). You may recall that the Swedish Hospital brain cancer caregivers' group transitioned into a widows' group, and that the widows graciously voted to invite me to join them. They support and encourage me, and demonstrate how life can go on despite what we had all been through. At the suggestion of a hospice social worker I started attending grief support groups at a local non-profit (the Healing Center). There I find support, understanding, acceptance and the realization that it could have been a whole lot worse (slim comfort but, sadly, true).
It's also where I found the date mentioned above, another recent widow. And that's enough to burden you with for now. I'll try and stay in touch occasionally if I see you actually reading this. You might care to mention to others that I've broken my long silence...
Meg would be proud of your strength and the path of your journey so far. And we are all so lucky to see you still in attendance at some of the concerts she so loved.
ReplyDeleteTami
"I've been quashing the desire to share with you every little bump along my road to emotional recovery" -- know that whatever it is we're always, always, ALWAYS here for you.
ReplyDeleteThe grace you possess is beyond the capabilities of words; I am truly in awe of you and as Tami said I know Meg would be proud as well. Six months later you are still in my thoughts and prayers, and I'm glad to hear that you're making some definite, if arduous, progress.
Bethany
Read it, Andrew and I'm proud of you. Enough said.
ReplyDeleteLinda
I'm happy for you, Andrew. I know loved ones want us to continue with life, enjoy and be well. At times it is very difficult, but best for all of us to move forward with a positive outlook and make the most of our lives (which isn't always easy). Sorry, trying to be positive, then throw in a negative thought, which is actually the way of life, with ups and downs. Sure I have run on sentences here and not the best of punctuation as I ramble on with my thoughts.
ReplyDeleteLori